Memoirs

20071116

Now Listening - the box fan in my room.

I'm in this rather "thankful" mood now.

I've just finished looking through the old cards and notes I've recieved since primary school. It's not a really thick stack, since I haven't really been that high profile around, but it's well enough to warm my heart.

So I just wanted to thank the following people in my life. *warning: long and mushy post.

The Lord Jesus Christ.
Thank You Lord for Your death on the cross. I will never comprehend the price which You paid not just for my soul but for the souls of humanity. I know You are looking for the pure and blameless Bride in this generation, the mature sons and daughters of God. Lord I know my faults, failures, weaknesses and inadequacies. Lord change me and make me willing to be changed by You.

Words will never be enough to thank You for Your faithfulness in my life despite the many and countless times I've been unfaithful towards You. I will never understand this love in which You have for me and will probably never fully grasp it. But I thank You all the same. "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28. And until that day comes and eternity begins, and even long after, I will never stop loving You God, for the price You paid and for buying my soul; for loving me so unconditionally, and simply for who You are; You are God.

My Dear Dear Seow Family.
Papa.
I really appreciate all the love you've shown me through the little actions that speak so much louder than words can. You can't express your love in other forms, but that's really alright, because I can FEEL it(mushy). The time every morning when you wake me up by bursting into my room with the MOP and poking that long stick with thick and wet hair through all the nooks and crannies of my messy room, usually with half the floor covered with things other than furniture (especially these days of exams, lots of files of subjects I prepare for next). And for always fetching me to school and from all the rest of the places, esp late at night. And for secretly eating my vegetables when I was young when Mummy was not looking. And for buying me that wombat stuffed toy in Australia when Mummy said, "Aiya all these at home got a lot already. Don't waste money." (Which I totally agree and advocate. But the little girl in me just HAD to have one animal, even if it meant an animal besides the koala bear or kangaroo.) I really really really appreciate all the acts of love, and even if you will never read this, I'm sure in heaven, you'll receive many many jewels for your crown, not just from me.

Mummy.
I will always remember your theory of HUG TO DE-STRESS (according to some show or report you read somewhere). And so I hugged you very often before I went down to my room for bed. Shi shang zhi you ma ma hao. You have never failed to be ever so self-sacrificial to your children despite the terrible tantrums that I throw once in a while and how these tantrums have evolved to very strange forms very recently, where I refuse to say a single word, and you simply give up. Still, I've always wondered how you do it, and how you manage to be such a wonderful parent, hardly thinking of yourself but always putting your children first. I really can't imagine myself to be as good a parent as you in future, because of how self-centred I sometimes am (or most of the time). And for all the pre-exam-nights, where I'm panicky (or not so), and you make me yan wo aka bird's nest (the stock has depleted just in time for my last major exams)! For taking leave from work on my exam days during primary school. I always felt extremely happy when you did that because primary school was the period I was really really attached to you. My dear dear mammoi, I will always be calling your name when I use my favourite toilet in the house(master bedroom) and when I come back home from wherever. Can continue, but let's move on.

Lynn and Priscilla.
My dear dear sisters. My two pillars of support in my spiritual life. I will always cherish the times we spent "hanging" out in your room and talking about life (marriages, church stuff, school, people etc.) and for your crazy entics. Like laughing uncontrollably for Lynn and voicing the stuffed toy animals sitting by the bedside for Pris. It was really only in recent years, like in sec school that I got closer to both of you all. Thank you for imparting all the Godly values that I see exemplified in your lives. And for scolding me to go and study and to not spend so much time on the computer. And for all the violent wake up calls to each other, failing half of the time. :)) And even when da jie gets married, we will still be close sisters. (getting a bit sentimental) Thank you for being such a very very great blessing in my life you two. Lynn che che and pris che che.

Ah Kong and Mama.
Although in recent years you both have seemed to really weaken physically and mentally(mama esp), I will always be ultra greatful for taking care of me when I was young when I was still in primary school and the gradual decrease in later years. For fetching me from school and eating at all those wonderful old haunts that we rotated like every three to four days. Ah kong for preparing my water bottle and tissue paper and school shoes and socks every morning for many years. For making me laugh with your special chuckle, which is still the same even until now. For always sending me to doctor Liew when I was sick, even after you couldn't drive, you took the cab with me. And not to mention monitored all my medicine taking times. Mama for making such wonderful fried durian kueh with leftover durian. And for walking all the way to the park connector because you were so worried for me when I rode there on the bicycle myself. For patting me to sleep when I couldn't go to sleep. For answering my favourite math question (what is 7 times 7) so many millions of times because I simply couldn't remember, and not getting irritated.

Uncle.
Your eccentric ways never fail to perk me up. Haha. Even today when you were all excited over the mountains of paper lynn che che didn't want. THE KARANG GUNI BLOOD RUNS IN THE FAMILY. I will never never forget the 'konk-ing' (onomatapoia) of the drink cans you collected in the middle of the night. Thought what happened you know. For the little car trips you made for me when papa wasn't around or when I was scared to ask him to drive me to church when I was already running late. I will also never forget how you only drove one car and the car number starts with SBK. Uncle, Uncle, Uncle, you are growing old, 60 already. Please eat more and don't starve yourself just to look SLIM (according to him. to me it's skinny.) and trendy. Thank you for the little things you do, I guess you're just like papa in this way. :))

What a wonderful family I have.

Sabrina Ong.
I've just read the many cards you've given me. I just wanted to say how I've looked up to you as a friend and as a leader even though you're no longer in the youth ministry and serving there. It's interesting how we like to look at the outward appearances and the talents and capabilities one have to judge how good that person is. But you're so different, you seem to be quite the average girl and not the most attractive person physically (like me. ahem. oops sp.) but wow, you're certainly one attractive person in terms of character and as a friend. You've really been such a pillar of support in my spiritual life especially these three years since we combined cell. I've always looked up to you as a sister and really respected you for your faithfulness and your love for God. Keep impacting those around you and you'll always be a dear friend to me.

Serena Chen.
You've been one great friend these past two years and esp this year when we got muchmuch closer to each other. I've reallyreally enjoyed all the pastamania meals we had (not to mention long johns, burger king and mcdonalds). I remember asking God a long while ago to give me a friend like Jonathan was to King David. But I never expected God to answer my prayer in JC when He placed You in my life. You're another one those few people which I can really open up to and talk not just about school stuff but also about spiritual stuff. It's really amazing how God brought the two of us together, and I think its safe to say this, that so far, you're the best friend that I've had (aside from my family). I've learnt so much from you and you've never failed to encourage me all the way through j2 when I felt lousy (even though I didn't show it). All the bus trips home on 15 and all the visits to your house. You're my dearest friend, Serena. And I really really pray that leaving JC wouldn't mean the end of our wonderful friendship as many of my friendships were, after each phase of my life. Even if we were to go to different unis, we must meet up often okay?

Actually I intended to thank so many other people. But I guess my weakness OVERCAME me and I started getting longwinded and now I'm very tired. I STILL have consultation tmr with Mr Wee. Wonder if his wife has delivered. Guess not.

OH YES. ONE MORE PAPER TO GO.

Literature Paper 3. I must do well.

After that. Time is luxury. Although it never was when Jesus said He was coming back quickly.

adora at 1:39:00 AM